"...All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us..."
~J.R.R. Tolkien
Thursday, July 11, 2002
Things are heating up around here. It's time for another case of "God's amazing sense of humor" to strike. My father has until the 15th of July to tell the Yakima school district if he will be coming back to work for them (he can afford to live there, but there's nothing he really wants to do). A few days ago, 4 other job offers opened up all over California. The Christian Academy is interviewing him tonight for a 4th grade position. The local school districts are trying to pull together one full time position between the four of them, and they'll let him know tomorrow. A school district in Southern California is letting him know in the next couple of days what job he has, and another in northern california. The problem is that all of these jobs don't pay enough for him to afford to buy a house (Ken is selling their house and reposessing their car) even if he and mom both work full time next year. It seems to me that some amazing offer is going to come in on the 15th that will allow them to afford to live, but not mean moving back to Yakima. Or maybe it's just wishful thinking on my part -- but isn't it just like Him to send in something amazing at the last minute? My dad is just sitting back and waiting for "door to open or close" as he always does. He's such a wise man -- I'll never be half as good as he is. I wish I could sit back and wait -- I tend to ask for direction, and then dash about pell mell. How does one "wait for God" anyway? As I said before, I gave my life over, but he isn't directing (that I can see -- which of course is limited). I feel like my life is in limbo -- like, God is waiting for me to stop running in circles and run toward him instead. But this isn't about me, it's about my father. (Both of them .. ha ha) Any of you who pray -- please pray for my family if you think of it. It's getting tense around here. Mother doesn't want to move. She hates the cold, and the winter, and the lack of sun. There must be a happy medium that doesn't involve my father either in a job he hates for the next 12 years, or both of them working like dogs to live. We'll know in 4 days. Yikes
I have created a monster. What on earth am I going to do with this one. Juan has decided that I am the most wonderful person in the world. he calls 5 times a day -- even when he knows I'm at work. He leaves messages on my maching "Hi--I miss you, just wanted to hear your voice. Bye Sweetie. Redhead. Angel." He comes up and pinches my cheek at work, and tries to get all mushy -- which; at work? The last thing I want is to become the object of speculation for the entire Alisal staff. They're the biggest group of gossips ever. I can understand being this mushy if, say, we had dated for ages, and perhaps were engaged. But THREE DATES?! He doesn't even read. One can't carry on an intellectual conversation with him at all. Our entire conversation when we go out consists of him telling me how much he's going to miss me. We walked around town and he kept trying to hold my hand, or touch my hair, or kiss my cheek. He took me to a bookstore, and made no pretence of actually being interested in them. He just wanted to follow me around an breathe down my neck. He won't ever see me again after another couple of weeks. He doesn't even KNOW me. He doesn't know what I like, or dislike, or what I read, or what kind of movies I like, or anything. I don't think he's a Christian (a TOP priority...should have asked him BEFORE I went out, but how does one bring that up in casual conversation?) And to compound the issue, I'm going out with Jeremy tonight (he, by the way, is a Christian). He asked me out the same night Juan did, but our schedules didn't match up until now. This has gotten too complicated. Now what am I supposed to do with this.
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